Another aspect of change that disconcerts me is trying to bring about change in myself. For example, I know that my intolerance is toxic but I cannot just will away my intolerance or morph into a person who tolerates everything with massive doses of loving kindness.
It took a long time to realize that trying to change to remove bad habits was a bit like rearranging the furniture during an earthquake - well, about as much use. Even if I can succeed in changing my behaviour, I won't have changed me. So it's inevitable that the behaviour will return, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, but it will always return.
The only way to achieve lasting change is to become aware of the conditions that have created my behaviour - the brainwashing, sleepwalking if you like - observe my cultural conditioning and see it for what it is. It is through awareness and understanding that I change. Through observation I come to see the world for what it is, shed the illusions that my conditioning or selective memory feed me and stop clinging to to power, prestige, success and all the other illusions.
To change my behaviour I start by changing my actions, not by eliminating the actions I want changed but by taking very different action. I watch and I learn about myself and through this process my attitudes start to change and when I approach the world with different attitudes my relationship with the world changes and my "bad" behaviours stop.
No comments:
Post a Comment